Birthday Vacay for SC

We "as a family" (mostly Awesome Hubs and I), decided that at least every couple of years, in lieu of spending a billion dollars and hours and hours of my time planning, prepping, and executing a party that will be over in a little more than two hours, and buying the latest-greatest-loudest-brightest toy that we will inevitably donate to Salvation Army the next time we clean out the bedrooms, we would take a mini vacation with the family for our kiddos' birthdays. A "birthday vacay" if you will. We are trying to make memories not stuff. We are attempting to give experiences instead of things.

The first to try this little experiment, was our Smaller Child. SC has his big cumpleanos numero seis on the seventh of July, so we planned a road trip to the Arbuckles and surrounding areas.

We spent the day running last minute errands, packing bags, and getting instructions ready for our pet sitter (Nana). After everything was ready, we still had about two hours to wait until Awesome Hubs (AH) came home, which coincidentally, in case you were unaware, was enough time for Smaller Child (SC) to ask "when are we leaving" or "is Daddy on his way home yet" exactly 6,532 times.

Waiting "patiently" for AH's arrival.

Once, we were finally in the car, we pulled out of the driveway, got about four houses down the street, and I realized I forgot to throw our bag chairs in the trunk, so we turned around and came home. (Incidentally, we only used them once... for about 5 minutes.) Back on the road, I glanced down at our hotel reservation to program it into the GPS, and realized that I had booked it a month later than we had planned!! We pulled back over, stopped the car, and I frantically called the nice people at the Hampton Inn in Ardmore, OK. They told me that they did in fact still have rooms available, and they could just change our reservation! Huzzah! Back on the road... A nice, less than two hour, drive resulted in minimum fights, but somehow managed to produce so much volume out of two boys. Like, unreal, hard to explain, nearly impossible to fathom, levels of noise.... but, we eventually made it to our hotel, and only had to change rooms once before we finally got to unpack.

SC and LC in the hotel.

After one, semi restless night, we woke up bright and early.  The boys headed downstairs for breakfast, and I got myself ready and our family packed for Day-One-O-Fun. We loaded the ice chest, packed our bathing suits, our lunches, sunscreen, and our unused but heaven forbid we leave them bag chairs, and went to explore. First stop, WAL MART! Wait... what? Yeah, it was raining, so we went in search of ponchos. By the time we found them, bought them, and made it to our first REAL stop, the rain had stopped all together. But, we had them "just in case" (kinda like those bag chairs).

Second stop, Tucker Tower on the edge of Lake Murray.

I have to mention, I had stupidly told the boys that morning that I heard as a kid, through my parents who tell stories, and from Girl Scouts, that Tucker Tower was haunted. So, it has always been a hard and fast truth in my life. Tucker Tower = Ghosties. I didn't even think before I said it... so, it took some serious convincing that Mom was full of bologna, and I was just "being silly" to convince SC to go. (Larger Child was totes excited! AH had the look of a grown man who was trying to convince himself that ghosts weren't real.) After a "small" hike up seven million rickety crooked wet stairs, we made it to the tower, and six gazllion more stairs up a winding staircase brought us to the top. (SUPER FUN for a lady with RA knees and back trouble.) But, it was worth it!

Tucker Tower

"Imma climb this rock." -SC

Flammy Selfie complete with Duck Face

AH did NOT want me taking this, but can you blame me... I mean right ladies?

My Boys

After our encounter with the (totally not real) ghosts of Tucker Tower, we drove to Sulphur, OK to the Chickasaw National Park. We made a stop at the Travertine Nature Center, and asked the Park Ranger where the best place to picnic would be, grabbed a park map, and headed out. We had an amazing PBJ lunch.

After our picnic, we started to look around for the least populated area to explore the springs. We quickly realized that all the spots marked on the map were overrun with park goers, and decided that we McQueens make our own spots! We found the perfect location, and spent the next several hours (after an awkward bathing suit change in the car) splashing around the beautiful cool waters of the springs.

There was a moment when I was sitting on a rock, my feet dangling in the water, where I was watching my three men play that I found myself just overcome with gratitude for it all. My family, our joy together, the beauty of our surroundings... then I got slapped in the back with SC's freeeeezing cold hands, and I snapped out of it! My gratitude was quickly replaced with pure hilarity though when LC decided it would be a good idea to totally submerge himself under a small waterfall. It was just too good.

After a while, we decided to at least let the kiddos see "Little Niagara." So, we took a walk, then a drive to the park goer hot spot to check it out. It lasted about five minutes before we were totally sick of the crowds and went back for a few more minutes to our quiet spot.

Since it was close to dinner time, we figured we should probably start heading home. A quick stop at the Nature Center to change out of our wet bathing suits, and we headed off to find some grub.

We stopped at La Taqueria in Ardmore for dinner and ate about 4 baskets of chips before our food even came. After dinner, we had sopapillias covered in chocolate, sprinkles, and whipped cream. Totally stuffed, and exhausted from the day, we went back to the hotel to shower, and get to bed.

Day two of our adventure started off similar to day one. We all went down for breakfast, then came back up to dress and pack up for the day's adventures. Our first stop this time was to a zip line over Turner Falls. There isn't much I can say about this beyond it was amazing... because, well, it was.

this is AH and SC

After the zip line, we thought we'd try to get in to Turner Falls to swim a bit. But, apparently they weren't kidding about it being "peak season." We spent 30 bucks to get in, we drove for about ten minutes just looking for a parking spot, but it was just a sea of cars and people, and people in cars. I have never seen anything like it, and I have been to both Disney parks. Needless to say, we didn't stay. So... off to stop number three.

I don't know how many of you have ever been to the next stop. But, it is one of those kinds of places where you just can't really describe to someone with any sort of precision. It is more of a feeling you get. I mean, telling someone, "So, okay... you pay a whole bunch of money to get a big ol bag of food pellets. Then, you drive your car over cattle grates and up big windy gravel paths. Then all of a sudden, the path is totally blocked with herds of donkeys! An ostrich starts pecking at your window, and giant llamas start closing in. But, here's the kicker, you're suppose to open your car windows and feed these things out of the Pepsi cups they give you. Yeah, I mean sometimes they try to bite you or your cup... and yeah, your car gets covered in poop and dirt. Half the time your kids are screaming, the other half you are... but guys... seriously... it is SO MUCH FUN!" it doesn't really do justice to the experience. So, I suggest, the next time you are driving down I-35, and have some time to kill, make a stop at Arbuckle Wilderness, you won't be sorry. Here are the highlights.

Note: Look how high up my window is rolled. Those critters are pushy.

This jerk tried to steal my whole cup of food with those chompers.

Super sweet alpaca. He even let us pet him.

SC calling over some alpacas.

We reached the donkey gang. The one on the left is their leader. 

One of my favorite pictures of all time.

look at all the turtles!! there's even a few snappers in there.

Can anyone say PROFILE PICTURE??

Little warning on the video... there may be cursing about camels.

After we all laughed so hard we nearly peed our pants, we went through the "walk through zoo" attached to the park. (It is basically an abandoned amusement park. Complete with creepy dark buildings, still open to the public, that they call their "snake house." A pond with more catfish, turtles, and perch than I have ever seen, non operating bumper cars and go carts, and a few forgotten animals in cages.) AH and I jokingly talked about putting an offer in to buy the place. It was sad seeing it all falling apart. Could you imagine? McQueen Zoo? (Secretly I can totally imagine it!!)

Leaving Arbuckle Wilderness, we had to stop across the street for the Famous Arbuckle Fried Pies!

Then we then were off, back to Lake Murray for an afternoon swim. Murray is a pretty clear (comparatively speaking) lake with a sandy bottom, making it perfect for swimming with the littles. It took a little coaxing, especially after seeing the pond at Arbuckle Wilderness with some of the biggest snapping turtles I have ever seen, to get SC in water any deeper than his knees. But, once we did, we all had a ball!

Look!! The bag chair is in use!!

We dried off, and headed back to the hotel for showers. Then, it was time for dinner. We went up the road to Two Frogs, a place we have always seen, but never stopped at. We were not disappointed! It was delicious!

By the time we got back to the hotel for the night, we were all pretty exhausted. AH and I needed a mini break from the kiddos, and I think the kiddos needed a mini break from us. They played on their bed, and Awesome Hubs and I plugged in ear buds and watched a Louis CK stand up special. We all crashed hard and slept in.

The last day, we had breakfast, and took a swim in the hotel pool. We had it all to ourselves. After about five minutes, AH and I got out, and let the littles enjoy. (There is something about being a child in water that prevents them from feeling just how miserably cold it is. They are immune.)

A pretty phenomenal belly flop!

We got back to the room, got dressed, packed up, and headed home. We were exhausted, which means we did it right! It was an awesome little trip, and I'm really hoping it was better than a bad cake and a party hat at some gross arcade. Here's to making memories! Here's to camel spit! Here's to lake water, tower ghosties, and mini waterfalls! Here's to Smaller Child as he turns six years old!

The Crayon Chapter Ends

It has been another couple of difficult months in the McQueen household. I have undergone another back surgery, and experienced a very slow recovery with several complications. However, despite the fact that I have been physically slowed to a stop, days keep on passing, kids keep on growing, life keeps on life-ing.

Larger Child, my first, my Sugar Bee, is eight days away from finishing elementary school. Hang on, you're gonna have to give me a minute...



...inhale....


....exhale....



Eight school days away from closing the chapter on childhood. Eight days away from the end of crayons and recess. I cannot believe we are here already, on the cusp of middle school, teenagers, lockers, hormones, homework, and all the other wonderful scary challenging hilarious exhausting things that come with that. I know they always say it goes so fast. But, guys... it goes SO FAST.

We have been gifted with the ability to have Larger Child in a really phenomenal school. Every single teacher there loves what they do, and has a real investment and interest in his personal growth and well-being. Some have loved and coddled him, some have challenged him and forced him to get uncomfortable enough to grow, most have done both. I have to say, each and every one of you who have had a hand in this young man's education and development are nothing less than angels to me. This boy is growing up to be something truly amazing... and I know for certain you have had a part in that.

Larger Child has hit a growth spurt this year that has been unlike any other previously experienced. And I am not just talking about the beginnings of puberty, though I am sure it has something to do with it. It seems as though he has undergone a spiritual growth. I am not sure if it was circumstances with me and my surgery/recovery, just a "right time" maturity boost, lessons from the environment, or a combination of all, but he is becoming such a beautiful and kind human being.

Every morning, he sets his alarm, gets up, makes he and his brother's breakfast. Get's ready for school, then packs he and his brother's lunch. After school, he walks his brother home from the bus, feeds the dog, does his homework, and often times helps me cook dinner. All of these things he does without being asked. Every. Day. These are just the "things" the chores that need to be done, but they are huge to me. They are things he has taken on without argument, because he knows it will help me out right now while I can't do it.

Beyond this, his heart... every morning he asks me how I slept, every afternoon, he asks me how my day was, every night, hugs and kisses before bed... Then the extra things... Yesterday, I had a traumatic experience with a baby bird right before he came home from school. He picked up on my heartache, and encouraged and allowed me to lay that out for him. He was compassionate, loving, kind, patient, and understanding. One of the best listeners I have ever had. He has also started being willing to ask for help, willing to say "I don't get it." Swallowing pride, letting go of the idea that he knows everything... even if it is just every once in a while... is beginning to happen.

I am not saying that this child is perfect, or done growing by any stretch. There are still fits, there are still loud sighs, eye rolls, anger issues, lack of self control... this is his humanness. BUT, I wanted to take a minute and recognize the beauty in his spirit. The God I am seeing in him. The changes and growth, letting go of ego, thinking of others, willingness to learn and adapt, tiny glimpses of selflessness... shining moments of love.

So, as we end this chapter of Larger Child's childhood, I see now that I can let go of fear. While I can (and most certainly will be) sad to see this part end, I have no doubt in my mind that he will strive and succeed in the next chapter. That he will continue to amaze me. That in his core, in his being, is beauty and light, and that will go with him even if the crayons don't.

Back to Gratitude, or a Love Note

I recently had back surgery. This was my very first "real" surgery, and there was no shortage of worry, stress, and fear on my part. I was concerned with the anesthesia, the healing, the pain, the recovery, the success of the surgery... but mostly I was concerned with the weeks of recuperation I had ahead of me. More specifically, letting go of all the things I usually did, or letting go of control.

I had about three days between my doctor's appointment where we decided that surgery was the best option, and the scheduled surgery itself. I filled every minute of those three days micromanaging, leaving sticky notes with instructions on pretty much every inch of my house.

I also had to swallow the ego, and do the one thing that I still find very difficult for some reason. I had to send the email to my friends not only letting them know this surgery was happening, but asking for help.Though, to be honest, it wasn't really asking so much as letting... they had been offering for the weeks leading up to the surgery. I had been putting them off saying things like, "oh you're so sweet, but we're okay" and "Kevin is an excellent cook, we've got it covered." While those things were in the most part true, Kevin is a great cook, we were okay, we were kind of all just getting by, stressed, in pain, tired, and stretched.

Here's the thing... I sent that email, and within five minutes, maybe less, I had a weeks worth of meals scheduled and coming to my house. By the end of maybe an hour, two weeks. I spent the better part of that day just listening to my email notification noise and crying.

You guys, I cannot even begin to express to you how that felt. To be so loved, so looked after. There was no hesitation. My "can you please help?" was answered with an immediate and overwhelming "YES! Of course!! Whatever you need!!"

Through these two weeks, I have had someone at my door every day to bring us delicious food, offer a gentle hug, share a smile and a laugh or two, and to generally all around fill my house and heart with love. It is no small thing. It has meant the world.

I have had texts, phone calls, messages, prayers, flowers. I have had errands run, sensitive personal items bought (I'm lookin at you Amy), and even an offer to shave my legs for me because I can't bend down to do it myself (Ah-Lee)!! I had one friend, who despite the fact that this is her wedding week, despite the fact that I had to heartbreakingly back out of being a bridesmaid, brought me food, checked on me several times, offered to do anything and everything in her power for to be a part of her day in any way I could... and even called TODAY, the day of her wedding to let me know she is thinking of me. I am not sure how I was ever blessed with such incredible friends... but I am pretty sure mine are the very best on the planet. I love you all SO SO SO much!!!

I also have to tell you my family has been incredible. My parents offered to drive up here from Texas to be here for the surgery (they would have spent more time in the car than I was in the hospital). I insisted they stayed home (which may have nearly killed my sweet mother). But I could feel them with me every second and step of the way. Story time... When I was checking in, the lady checking in next to me had my mother's name, Lavada. This is NOT a common name. They were there. God was showing me that they were there. Beyond that, I got a text or a phone call from one or both of them every day since checking on me, and a delivery of the most beautiful pale orange roses I have ever seen. I love you both, More than I could ever say.

My mother in law has done absolutely everything she can to help us. She has watched my children after school, kept them on the weekends, taken them at six in the morning when my husband leaves for work, fed them, got them to school. She has taken off work just so that I knew I had someone close in case I needed her. But, my favorite, she picked me up and took me with her on Tuesday to go vote. It was a very moving moment for me. She is AWESOME. I. Love. This. Woman.

My children have been wonderful. These boys who are slaves to routine, have been so very flexible, easy going, and kind. They have given me gentle hugs and kisses every day, and prayed for me every night. And when my oldest kind of got the shaft for his birthday, he assured me it bothered me more than it did him, saying, "Mom, you know I totally understand right? It's okay! No big deal!" Truth or not, it raised my heart to hear it. Thank you boys... Mama loves you.

This brings me to my beautiful husband. For that, I have to back up a few weeks. The back issues manifested itself as extreme sciatic pain. It was very sudden, and the most painful thing I have ever experienced... including the birth of both my viking children. It kept me up all night for the better part of a month. I couldn't lie down, and was up constantly pacing the floors. He was up with me, sitting on the couch watching me pace. He would have held my hand and paced with me had I let him. He held me when I cried. Let me squeeze him when the pain was too much to do anything else. He rubbed my back, was constantly researching things that might help until we could get in to the surgeon. He took off work to come to every appointment. He was my advocate in the doctors' offices, speaking up for me when I was too tired or in too much pain to do it myself. He cooked, cleaned, fed, bathed, brushed, dressed, drove our kids, and sometimes me.

Then, surgery day came.

The night before, neither of us could really sleep. We were both nervous. We woke up, got ready and drove to the hospital. The car was pretty quiet. It was dark when we got there, and we stayed in the car for a moment in silence... I was praying. I certain he was too. We checked in, and he did his very best to make me smile, crack some jokes... make it light. But, the closer it got, the less funny it was for both of us. Finally, it was about go time, and I asked him to come over I kissed him, he kissed me back. There was a look shared between us I will NEVER forget. One of pure love, It was beautiful.

After I woke up from surgery, I waited for him to come into the room. It was like I was holding my breath until I saw him. I needed see him, to come up for air... and then I did.

He stayed home with me the next couple of days, juggling bringing me my meds, making sure I ate, and working from home. Then, taking care of the boys when they got home from school. He has lifted me in and out of bed, helped me walk around the house, cleaned my incision site, bathed me, dressed me, kept me on schedule with my medications, kept my spirits up when they were down, reminded me to take it slow, put up with my micromanaging, kept the house up, juggled the kids' schedules... and all without complaining, all with love and service. There are not words to tell you or him what he means to me, how much I appreciate him, how grateful I am for him. This has brought us closer in ways I wasn't expecting. This has put a few more stitches in between our ever connected hearts. He was and is and always will be my superhero.

And, for the record... he didn't need any of my sticky notes.

A Pirate PAAARRRRTY

I cannot believe it, but our Smaller Child turned FIVE YEARS OLD. FIVE. That is like, half a decade already. I am flabbergasted by how quickly time is flying by.
Last weekend, we had a party for my little chicken. A pirate paAAARRRty!

We went to Unpluggits, where the whole idea is that all the play is without electronics. They have a huge indoor playground in the shape of a pirate ship, and tons of paint and take crafts for the kids to do.  The kids had a BALL!

Here's Smaller Child in a night costume, guarding the ship port.

The window to our party room was painted.

Dad and SC painting a treasure chest.

The pAARRRty snacks. Pirate booty, fruit swords, cannon balls, Jolly Roger Cakes, Fish and Chips.

(and pirate bananas)

Our swarthy captain! 

It was a fantastic party that seemed to go over well with all the (12) kids. Our little man sure enjoyed himself, and really that is the main goal. I am SO over the moon in love with this little dude. He is hilarious, tenacious, charming, sweet, kind, thoughtful, and well... just plain ol awesome. I cannot believe I am lucky enough to be his MOM! Happy Birthday Chicken!!


Smaller Child Stats:
5 years old
height: 3ft 10 and 1/2 inches (1/2 inch shorter than Big Bro was at SIX)

Favorites:
color: red
tv show: Max and Ruby
movie: Star Wars (any of them)
food: cookies (specifically chips ahoy)

Without My Face On

In the midst of the summer, there are many days when I put on comfy clothes, no make up, barely dry my hair and just be. Yesterday was one of those days. When I awoke, I had no plans of going out, so the boys and I spent the morning in a lazy routine. Then, we decided to take to the streets to hunt for Pokemon. This lead to spending the entire day going all over town to a zillion places and seeing a zillion people... and me, without my "face on." I made a passing comment to Larger Child in the midst of a crowd, "Man, I probably should have put make up on today." This was his reply:

"Mom, be proud of yourself. You don't need make-up. If Dad was here, he would say something like, 'You're hot without make up. You don't need make-up to look beautiful.'"

I smiled, and said, "you're right, sweets. Thank you." But, my heart grew three sizes that day.

I would like to take a moment to express, though I am not sure I have the words to do it, my gratitude and love for my BNSBH. This is a man who, every day, several times a day makes sure I feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, with or without make-up.  Our boys see this every day. They are learning, through him, how to be a man. They are learning what it means to love and respect their spouse, how to show them kindness, selflessness, and generosity. They are seeing what it means to be in a partnership. They are seeing what it means to be in a healthy and loving marriage. These are the values they are being raised with, these are the values that they are seeing every day, and these are the values that they too have adopted. I am SO grateful.